So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize