Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Randomize