Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize