just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize