Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
