dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
So squirting runs in the family.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
