So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
worst night to have a conscience
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.