God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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