no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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