BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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