My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
