Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
