So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
