Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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