forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
