I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
