So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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