Who wears a wallet chain?!
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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