yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I would ride that face into the sunset
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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