and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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