What did we do last night that was yellow?
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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