After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize