Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
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He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
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Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize