I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Too much gin, very little bucket
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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