Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
