I want to stick my p in your. b.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
