Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
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Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
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studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize