his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
As shirtless as possible
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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