I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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