This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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