She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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