So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
