I just made out with a guy for $7.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
