so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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