Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
This baby is an asshole
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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