I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
