We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize