hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize