ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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