please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
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