Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
God, I missed his penis.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
