you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
The power of my boobs compel you
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Shame - the story of my life.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
