You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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