ugly people sure do ruin things
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
