So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
