OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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