my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.