After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
The struggles of a small town man whore
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I have post one night stand depression
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
