Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.

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  (248): I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard. http://tfl.nu/wcz2
  Replies (2) Good night (1402) Bad night (523)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Duck Duck Cougar?

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  (602): Duck Duck Cougar? http://tfl.nu/gtca
  Replies (2) Good night (2804) Bad night (597)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?

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  (303): If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom? http://tfl.nu/ym23
  Replies (24) Good night (767) Bad night (4455)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.

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  (513): Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside. http://tfl.nu/2kyw
  Replies (24) Good night (4956) Bad night (967)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.

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  (256): Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay. http://tfl.nu/5ucl
  Replies (27) Good night (1478) Bad night (4947)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes

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  (859): i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes http://tfl.nu/xf12
  Replies (19) Good night (994) Bad night (3642)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.

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  (604): 5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real. http://tfl.nu/vlat
  Replies (7) Good night (5138) Bad night (1168)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm pregnant just thinking about him.

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  (412): I'm pregnant just thinking about him. http://tfl.nu/pqtq
  Replies (34) Good night (3368) Bad night (4384)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.

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  (301): so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq. http://tfl.nu/u32g
  Replies (7) Good night (957) Bad night (1588)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless

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  (774): Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless http://tfl.nu/p1o5
  Replies (4) Good night (1880) Bad night (700)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang

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  (480): Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang http://tfl.nu/1oo5
  Replies (12) Good night (4166) Bad night (798)
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  (408): View more from California

  You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.

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  (408): You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it. http://tfl.nu/jmvc
  Replies (6) Good night (1267) Bad night (805)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.

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  (813): A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise. http://tfl.nu/t24q
  Replies (2) Good night (448) Bad night (1434)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?

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  (207): Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable? http://tfl.nu/gzc0
  Replies (2) Good night (311) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?

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  (609): Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you? http://tfl.nu/wmz0
  Replies (1) Good night (403) Bad night (251)

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