I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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