I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
then he tried to convert me to islam
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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