uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
